How much do you love yourself? Such a simple question yet one we all have struggled with from time to time. Now that “self love” and “self care” have almost become buzz words in many of our social circles, it has become far too easy to merely gloss over truly loving ourselves. I mean after all, why would I actually want to take the time and effort to care for and love myself when I can simply add these phrases as hashtags and captions to my next social media post?

Sitting back reflecting on this I had to honestly ask myself, Rodnisha how much do you love yourself? If I am being honest with you, I didn’t like the answer. This year I have prided myself on being away from home and enjoying the much needed space away from some painful situations that I left behind me. Growing and evolving into a new and more beautiful version of myself I have adjusted my focus to only see all of my growth and change. With such evolution however, I suddenly realized that in so many ways I still have not committed to showing and giving myself the love I truly deserve. 

As a lover and helpless romantic I love going big for those I love. Always willing to go above and beyond for others, I now question why that same drive and determination hasn’t always poured over into cultivating my own wellbeing. Rearing its ugly little head in the smallest of ways I realized how easily I put my feelings, desires, and needs behind those of others. In short, I realized the truth of how I was not loving myself as I thought I was. 

Forced to accept this harsh reality, I no longer want self love to be something I encourage in others only to neglect it within myself. Steering away from such hypocrisy I have decided to reevaluate the ways in which I fall short in loving myself. One way I noticed is with my writing. As much as I love writing and pouring myself into my craft I often find myself hesitating to release my work or even create new content for fear that no one will see it. No more. Today I write for me, because in the end that is the only person who has to live with all of the words jumbled and cramped inside of my head. I am the only one who carries the weight of the unwritten stories buried in my bones. If I don’t get the words out, I am doing an injustice to myself; that isn’t self love. 

So here is to my continued growth and development, and to turning self love and self care back into actions, instead of leaving them as good ideas for tomorrow’s Instagram post. I love myself, and I hope you remember to find time to love yourself throughout your day too. Remembering that the number on the scale, or the fat hanging around your hips, coupled with the desire to rid your body of them both do not determine your worth. We are worthy of the best love that there is, so it is time we turn that hashtag into solo dates, candlelit baths, and a splash of self confidence to match.  

“Eat like you love yourself. Move like you love yourself. Speak like you love yourself. Act like you love yourself.”

-Tara Stiles

Published by Rodnisha Ford

As a healer, creative, and dance enthusiast Rodnisha moves to the beat of her own imagination. Committed to helping people find creative ways to heal, she uses writing and personal narrative as a healing outlet in hopes of encouraging and inspiring others to do the same. Find more of her writing and learn about her holistic wellness consultation services at blackgirlwrites.com.

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